How to fight smarter

Many of us feel stressed or overwhelmed during fights with our partners. We often feel under threat when tension is running high because we believe we've got something to loose. This inevitably activates a sort of self-preservation mode in our bodies, which can look like withdrawal – aka shutting down or avoiding. Or we might move toward our partner, but with a vengeance –  aka defensiveness or criticism.

Even if we manage to communicate during these stressful states, the conversation often derails into something that detracts from the matter at hand which only causes more insecurity, confusion, and disconnection. 

Ever get stuck in a game of “who’s version of the story is right,” or “kitchen sinking” – where you remind each other of everything they've ever done “wrong?” This is exactly what I’m talking about. These distractions don’t move us any closer to the confidence, clarity, or connection we seek, yet because we think we’re gaining some sense of control in the fight, we often fall prey to this never ending struggle for power.

I get it. Fighting sucks. At times, it can seem like your partner just doesn’t care, or that the “thing” you’re fighting about will never go away… but don’t be deceived by your thoughts. You’re not a slave to “the way things are.” There's a way to resolve the "unresolvable." There’s a way to prevent most fights from happening in the first place. There’s a way to feel confident, clear, and connected even when shit gets hard.

There's a way to fight smarter...

You're not a slave to
"the way things are."

If you want to flip the script on how you do conflict, you must get meta to the invisible factors that are influencing your thoughts, emotions, and communication patterns – both upstream and when you’re knee deep in a fight.

That’s to say, you’ve got to see the unseen and lay a new framework for how you'll show up when tension comes knocking. How to fight smarter will help you do just that, so you can feel confident, clear, and connected with your partner even when shit get hard.

What's inside the course:

Intro - How to fight smarter
(20 min audio)

What to expect from the course.

Module 1 - The root of conflict
(30 min audio)

How unmet needs are the underlying cause of every conflict, and how to identify them.
(Key topics: Needs, desires, unspoken boundaries, unspoken expectations).

Module 2 - Wired for division
(30 min audio)

How our brain's biases tend to set us up for conflict and how to get meta to them.
(Key topics: Cognitive biases, identity, truth vs. reality).

Module 3 - The feels
(30 min audio)

How to be with uncomfortable emotions so you can remain present during conflict.
(Key topics: Sensation, feeling, emotion, emotional agility/resilience)

Module 4 - The power move
(35 min audio)

How deep listening transforms your partner's ability to hear and empathize with you.
(Key topics: Listening dos/don'ts, non-verbal communication, meaning making)

Module 5 - In the thick of it
(48 min audio)

How the words we use make the difference between conflict and collaboration.
(Key topics: Default communication patterns vs intentional communication)

🎈🎈🎈Bonus module🎈🎈🎈
- Effective requests​ (17 min audio)

How to make a request you're more likely to get a yes to.​

Confidence, clarity, and connection even when shit gets hard? Yes, it's a thing.
And you can learn it.

Purchase  How to Fight Smarter for $47 USD